Mervyn : I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Mervyn: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.
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Mervyn : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Mervyn : Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.


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Mervyn : If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Mervyn: No, I'll also stay with your sister.


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Mervyn : People consider me as a 'GOD..'
Wife: How do you know??
Mervyn : When I went to the Park today, everybody said, Oh GOD! U have come again.



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Mervyn complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing, except the TV in my house.'
Police: 'How come the thief did not take the TV?'
Mervyn: 'I was watching TV news...'


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Mervyn comes back to his car & found a note saying 'Parking Fine'.
He writes a note and sticks it to a pole saying 'Thanks for complement.'


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How do you recognize Mervyn in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from this book when the teacher erases the board.


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Once Mervyn was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.
So the man asked him why he did so.
He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot..
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Mervyn in a bar and his cellular phone rings.
He picks it up and Says : 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'


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Mervyn : Why are all these people running?
Man : This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Mervyn: If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?


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Teacher : Convert this sentence 'I killed a person' into future tense.
Mervyn : The future tense is 'u will go to jail.'


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Mervyn told his servant : 'Go and water the plants!'
Servant : 'It's already raining.'
Mervyn : 'So what? Take an umbrella and go.'


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A man asks Mervyn : Why D.M.Jayaratne goes walking in the Evening and not in the morning?
Mervyn replied : D.M.Jayaratne is PM not AM..